Well, I got my coffee and made it back without incident. The woman who always wants the computer is on the phone at the moment, so I have a brief reprieve. This is her computer, but our rent includes computer usage, and we pay extra for the internet, so I feel like that should buy me just a little uninterrupted writing time. I have four weeks until school starts and after that, I will have neither the time nor the energy to "debrief" by writing through the last year of craziness. I need to write it now. And I don't want to keep grumping, but suffice it to say that it's difficult to write yourself back into a moment and thoroughly express it when someone is standing behind you, sighing. Or when they ask you point-blank to move so they can Ebay.
She's a really nice lady, by the way, and so is her mother, who owns this place. I just adore them both. I'm just frustrated because I NEED to write and there is always something stopping me. Also I feel a little miffed when she sees me heading for the computer and tells me she needs it for a few minutes first, and then she's on for several hours -- long enough for me to lose the idea, or lose the fire, or for Daniel to come home from work and interrupted me, or for Lola to need attention, or for me to have to leave for work, or for another roomie to turn on the TV full-blast ... Get the idea? Quiet moments for writing are rare around here and I get really frustrated when I think I've got one, and then I'm asked to give it up. Every. Time.
I really can't wait to move. I do really like these people, and I love all the animals and living in an animal-friendly environment. But I have outgrown the ability to share a home gracefully with so many other people. I'm twenty-seven. I want my own kitchen. I want furniture. I want to take a shower and still have hot water. I'm tired of people eating my groceries and not telling me or replacing them. I'm tired of the two "men" who live here acting like college boys and drinking in the yard and leaving this place a mess and never cleaning up after themselves. I'm tired of neurotically watching my dog at every second, lest anyone should let her out. I'm tired of being able to fit all my worldly belongings into a Plymouth Voyager with room to spare. Don't worry, I won't be lonely when I leave -- Daniel (my partner) and my cat and dog will come with me. We just can't afford it yet. Sadly, I also can't afford a laptop, or even to replace the monitor for my old, broken-down computer. We just got through some hard times and now we're on solid ground, but only just.
Anyway, I'm sorry for the rant! I've needed to vent about this for a while, I guess! I feel better, and now it's back to the writing, hopefully without interruptions! |